Modern Dating Tips For The Internet Age | Warrior Forum
Modern Dating Tips For The Internet Age | Warrior Forum
Are you prepared to be frank about your dating history? If you’ve found this article, you should be!
It’s not necessarily how we see love in romance novels. It’s challenging!
We’re not here to pass judgement; we’re also single and have had to figure out the hard way how to date in the modern world.
So, at each stage of the dating process, here are our finest dating advice and even a few dating rules!
The definition of dating comes first, of course!
The definition of dating
You might be wondering (like many modern daters!) Why do people date? It could be difficult to understand.
People can interpret “dating” differently, especially given that the conventional definition of the term is evolving and growing all the time. When two people “date,” they are actually in a close relationship. Although the term “dating” suggests a sexual component to the relationship, this is not a must. Serious, casual, monogamous, open, polygamous, short-term, or long-term dating are all possible.
Nowadays, the term “dating” serves as an all-encompassing phrase for a wide variety of romantic partnerships.
The most typical phrases used to describe dating include:
- Going out
- Being with someone
- Seeing each other
- Just friends
- Friends with benefits
- Hooking up
Now let’s get into dating advice and tips!
Modern dating advice and tips
First Date Prep!
Take a moment to consider what you want from your dating experience before you get all giddy in the mirror and leave on your first date (s).
Are you looking for a fun night out or something more serious?
Once you are aware of it, let the person you are seeing know what your objectives are. It eliminates a lot of guesswork on both ends if you get that out of the way. You won’t need to do any reading between the lines to figure out if they and you are on the same page, so you can truly enjoy their company. Accept the fact that your hobbies don’t match, and let the other person know.
Ask questions and practice active listening
You probably text or message someone on an online dating app or site before you even go on your first date. Or perhaps you met in person or through acquaintances; in either case, communication has certainly already begun before the first date!
Try to restrain yourself from memorising interesting details about yourself to share anytime the discussion stalls. I know it comes naturally to you. Asking questions and providing answers makes the conversation more about the other person, which fosters genuine interaction.
If you’re looking for some conversation starters, check out our list of the best online dating questions!
You can certainly answer the standard “What do you do? “, “What Netflix series are you currently binge-watching?” Those are timeless phrases. But also consider unconventional ideas.
Take the conversation where it leads you. In your conversation, look for commonality.
It’s alright to sit in discomfort during brief silences, so don’t be afraid of them.
Rephrasing or confirming what they’ve said can help if you’re having problems thinking of small talk:
Online: “Yeah, I’m an intern for this city NGO. Although it takes a lot of work, I like it.
It’s a lot of work, right?
Online: “I have a lot of practical tasks, like engaging with our clients directly. Do you ever experience that at work?
Have reasonable expectations
Many people try to approach dating with minimal or no expectations, but that can quickly backfire!
I have a lot of dating expectations for the partner I select, and that’s good, even healthy, as a queer woman of colour.
Personally, I look for someone who is externally compassionate, ambitious, and politically knowledgeable. I need to be with someone who, at the very least, respects my main principles. I implore you to make a mental list of the qualities you desire in a mate. Having a list might help you decide if this is the person you want to spend your time with, even though your list might look very differently from someone else’s.
Don’t worry about who is paying
A sound general rule of thumb is that the person who initiated the date should be the one who pays for it.
Consider splitting the bill or even volunteering to pay if you’re going somewhere fancier or you’re aware that there are power dynamics in the relationship (for example, one person makes much more money than the other). It’s generally a good idea to plan a date that doesn’t involve spending additional money. Visit a museum, have a picnic in the park, or take a ferry at night. You have choices.
Share your location with someone
We all value safety when it comes to dating, so you must do this!
Let someone know where you’re going and what you’re doing, whether you’re meeting someone through a dating app or through a common acquaintance. It may be your best friend, the child whose sweater you took, or even your parents. Not only are you staying secure, but you also have someone with whom to share your experiences after the date. Win-win situation.
Sex can be cool
When you click with your date, you might want to continue the conversation. You shouldn’t let an arbitrary rule determine who you go home with.
However, make sure you’re engaging in safe, consent-based sex.
What should you NOT do while dating?
Ghosting won’t assist you in meeting someone.
Even if you’re not required to contact your date after a bad date, ghosting isn’t the best course of action. Although you might be tempted to ignore the texts or leave the DMs open, keep in mind that your date is also a person.
It’s not necessary to offer them a Spark Notes summary of what you believe went wrong, but a nice conclusion would stop them from inferring anything. It’s simple to hide behind a screen when dating in the twenty-first century; fight the impulse.
However, it’s acceptable to ghost someone if you feel unsafe and think doing so will be beneficial for your physical, mental, and/or online well-being.
Put the phone away
Again, I am aware that, when you’re on a first date, the cool metal screen essentially burns a hole in your pocket. The need to access Snapchat or scroll through Twitter simply to check yourself out will likely continue throughout the date, but resist the urge. The success of the entire outing may depend on your ability to keep your attention on the person in front of you. I advise either completely putting your phone away or setting it to Do Not Disturb for the duration of your date. Keeping distractions to a minimum will improve your ability to concentrate and even relax.
Avoid ex-talk — Please!
This advice very much speaks for itself. On a first date, discussing your ex-partners and prior relationships never creates a favourable impression. It produces strange tension in the space and is typically followed by an awkward silence that lasts for a long time. To avoid talking about your ex-partners, literally look for something else to discuss. What book are you attempting to read but failing to do so? Which TikTok is playing continuously in your mind? Dunkin’ or Starbucks? ANYTHING!
Think about a drink, just don’t pregame
There is nothing wrong with attempting to relax before a first date by having a drink. I do advise that you and your date keep a record of any inebriated encounters. Save the beforehand for another night. Drinking without your date can come across as sloppy. A drink or two together can help ease the nerves. If you arrive at the date already inebriated, you can lose part of your discernment. Unprofessional and perhaps quite off-putting.
Don’t get carried away
After your first date, there are times when you feel like you’ve found the one! Maybe this individual was even better than you could have imagined. The next thing you know, you’ve invested much too much in a new romance. Remember that there’s more to this person than what you just experienced on your first date. I know it’s thrilling to get caught up in first date nervousness and post-first date happiness. There is a lot you have yet to learn because everyone strives to present their best selves on a first date. Keep calm and continue to have fun.
Dating tips for new relationships
Keep your routine
New relationships are exciting because they give you the chance to discover life with someone new, but don’t ignore the one you’ve already created for yourself. Too frequently, when entering a new relationship, a person neglects other facets of their life, such as their family, friends, school, or profession.
While it’s common to get sucked into a new companion or relationship, keep in mind that you still have a support system that depends on you. Make sure you aren’t giving up your interests or hobbies in order to spend endless hours with your new companion.
Don’t stress about social media
Again, dating in the internet age presents a completely new set of challenges. When you start a new relationship, you can be hesitant to write about it online. Or you’re wondering if they’ll ever share a picture of you on social media. You can decide when/if to publish about your new relationship on your social media platforms by debating whether or not they are tech-savvy on social media. Always check in with your spouse to learn about any privacy issues they may have.
Keep asking questions
You don’t necessarily know your partner well just because you two have agreed to start dating. Although first dates are an excellent opportunity to learn about someone’s interests and history, there is always more to discover. Ask inquiries and carry on the discussion when you can in an effort to get to know your spouse. Even after you’ve had an exclusive relationship with your spouse, it’s beneficial (and enjoyable) to continue “dating” them. You might be surprised!
Talk about your boundaries
Good boundaries and honest communication are essential components of any relationship that will last. I am aware that the talk might be difficult or uneasy, particularly if you start to get too personal, but it is worthwhile. It’s preferable to be upfront about everything you need your spouse to know when the relationship is still new. Hopefully, your partner will accept it and you’ll have a chance to emotionally connect with them.
Enjoy the present
New partnerships are wonderful because they start from scratch. You can begin again. No fuss. It’s an opportunity to develop both as a partner and as a person. Embrace it! Try to live in the present and take each day as it comes. A healthy relationship is paved by expressing gratitude for the time you have with your partner. Concerning 1, 3, or 5 years from now, don’t worry. You should attempt to make the most of the time you have.
Antiquated dating rules
The dating game we play today is very different from the dating game our parents played. Some of the rules or advice they learned in elementary school may still be useful, but others may be out-of-date and archaic.
You must establish your own dating guidelines and discuss them with potential partners while you are dating.
What is the 5 date rule? What is the 10 date rule?
The five-date rule and the ten-date rule are both quite archaic customs. According to the “5 Date Rule,” a woman should have at least 5 dates with her spouse before engaging in sexual activity. According to the “10 date rule,” men shouldn’t consider the women they are dating as potential girlfriends or wives until they have 10 nice dates with them. Both of these guidelines obviously have a strong gender bias and set high standards for both parties.
What is the 222 rule?
The 222 rule encourages partners to go on dates every two weeks, take a weekend trip every two months, and take a week off every two years as a strategy to keep marriages or longer relationships “exciting.” Although every couple may not be able to stick to this exact schedule, it does help to put your relationship first. It keeps both parties committed to the union. In essence, it permits the couple to continue dating even after they have been married for a long time.
It can also be a conventional way of thinking about relationships, even though it might be effective for some. The partner(s) may believe that they ONLY need to carry out this task and disregard the quiet, private moments shared during routine interactions.
Dating questions everyone secretly has
How often should you see someone you’re dating?
You shouldn’t fall madly in love with someone after the first date, as we already indicated. While getting to know someone is thrilling and pleasant, taking things slowly can really foster romantic chemistry and dynamics.
Beginning slowly also conveys that you aren’t completely accessible to satisfy them and that they must merit your attention.
We advise starting with 1-2 dates each week and building up from there. Additionally, you don’t want to visit them so frequently that you grow bored or the bond becomes stale!
Is it wrong to date multiple people at once?
Dating numerous people can occasionally speed up the process of determining what you want in a partner. On occasion, your busy schedule makes it too hard to handle.
When can you tell someone that you love them?
Oh, that important query that everyone subconsciously poses to themselves. Early on in a relationship, you might have sentiments of “love”; yet, sometimes these feelings are simply caused by being extremely enamoured with a new person.
People frequently establish a rule in their relationships that they won’t be the first to say something. This might be a little poisonous.
When should you meet someone’s parents?
In any relationship, getting to know someone’s family may be a major step. This demonstrates a great deal of faith in and dedication to the other person and the relationship.
Make sure YOU are prepared if someone invites you to meet their parents. There is no predetermined time range for this; rather, it depends on how you feel about the development of the relationship and how at ease you are with taking the next step.
Every relationship is unique
The road to love is not a straight one. These dating ideas and suggestions are not a one-size-fits-all strategy to finding love, regardless of whether you’re in an open relationship, searching for love on an online dating app, or deeply involved in a relationship already.